She almost missed it.
A mom I know was sitting at her son's IEP meeting when someone at the table asked if there was anything new going on with him at home.

Her face lit up.

He had just earned a new belt in karate, she said. He'd been working toward it for months. The night he got it, he wouldn't stop talking about it.

The team smiled. Someone said that was wonderful.
And then the principal directed everyone to the next section of the IEP.

The meeting moved on.

What nobody said, what nobody seemed to notice, was that a child who works toward something for months, who earns it through repetition and discipline and practice, and who can't stop talking about it when he finally gets there...

...is a child who just told you exactly how he learns.

That's not a fun fact about his weekend. That's a clue.
 

Here's what a teacher who follows that clue could do:

• Reading: Choose books where the main character trains for something, earns a rank, or masters a physical skill, so he's reading about a world that already makes sense to him.
• Writing: Ask him to write the steps it takes to earn a belt, sequencing, detail, and pride all show up naturally when the topic is his.
• Math: Calculate the speed of a kick, the angles of a stance, the number of practice repetitions it takes to move up a level, suddenly math has stakes.
• Self-regulation: Use the karate concept of *bowing in*, a moment of stillness before practice begins, as a transition ritual before hard work in the classroom.
• Leadership: Ask him to demonstrate a move or teach a sequence to a classmate, he becomes the expert in the room, which changes how he sees himself and how others see him.
  
  Now think about your own child.
  
  What do they love? What do they talk about on the drive home? What do they do on a Saturday morning when nobody tells them what to do?
  
  Those are clues.
  That's what strengths are.
  
  Clues. About how your child learns, what motivates them, and where they belong in a school day.
  
  When those clues get followed, the IEP builds toward your child belonging and learning in the general education classroom.
  
  When they get listed and ignored, your child gets moved in a direction nobody ever announced out loud.
  
  Most parents sitting at that table have no idea there's a difference, because nobody ever pointed to it.
  
  That mom never said anything in that meeting. She didn't know she could.
  
   

I'm building something for you, so the next time someone at that table moves on, you don't.

More on this very soon, 
 

P.S.  Know a friend who would be amazed at how something as simple as a karate belt can unlock an entire approach to teaching? Think of what's possible for your friend's child. Forward this to them.